My blood is nothing but alcohol at this point. I can't stop myself from drinking a lot. It doesn't matter if I am downing beer, cocktails, or on the rocks, I will drink everything in sight. I enjoy the feeling of being tipsy and getting random blacko...

I think I baked just about every flavour of pie there is on this planet by being the model housewife. The best pie does not involve an oven though. The recipe includes a dashing lad's dipstick, a bed-- though not necessarily, and my aching cunt.

I may sound desperate, but there is no other way for an old hag such as myself to get a man but to be really desperate. I will be down on my knees if I have to just to experience again the intense sensation of having a man fuck me hard until my body ...

I've had a battery-operated boyfriend for the past 5 years and it does more good to me than my prick of an ex-husband if we're being honest. I'm still craving for a well hung lad though, nothing beats the elementary kind of fucking.

I have come to the conclusion that the best way to give a blowjob is to ask the bloke how he likes it. Though there are some who don't quite know how to ask for things. Which is why I base what they fancy on how much they moan and writhe.

Tired of sending messages to women who seen zone you? Tired of chatting with ladies who are conservative? Hoping for a drastic change in your life before your penis retires? I'm here for you. I like men who are really dirty.